Author: shatteredtenshi and kira_shadow
Genre: Emo, Angst
Pairing: Kitayama Hiromitsu x Fujigaya Taisuke
Warnings: Unbeta-ed...character death, emo...
Notes: Please have tissues prepared before reading.
Summary: The aftermath of a tragedy...
Until We Meet Again
By Shattered Tenshi and Kira Shadow
The last thing Hiromitsu remembered hearing was the loud sound of sirens and people screaming. The last thing he remembered feeling was Taisuke's weak breath against his neck and his boyfriend's body against his. Breathing...that meant the other was still alive...and he could feel a whole body against his...but then again...Hiromitsu couldn't really feel part of his own body anymore. His legs were going numb and there was a kind of dull pain moving from his mid-back downwards. Darkness was tugging on his vision and he could hear how his heartbeat slowed in his ears...
Leaning forward he pressed a weak kiss against Taisuke's lips before his head dropped and red and darkness tugged on his vision. Then there was silence.
Yokoo almost tripped over his own feet when he ran to the hospital. There was a huge chaos in front of it so he decided to take the side entrance and ran half-way around the huge building. It had been one of the heaviest typhoons this season and apparently some of the advertisement boards of a building along the traintracks hadn't been able to withstand the winds and had hit the train passing by. It had been derailed completely and at least 2 carriages had been shattered. At least a hundred people had been reported as dead or injured.
Sending his prayers to the gods, he hoped that his friends were safe. He knew that Taisuke and Hiromitsu had been on that train, on the way home from work.Even though he'd avoided he masses at the entrance, he had to queue at the information desks - more had been set up to accomodate the huge onslaught of people.
When he finally arrived in front of the ICU, he found the Fujigaya family and Hiromitsu's mother. The latter was crying miserably in the arms of Taisuke's mother and Yokoo's heart sank. Fujigaya Ryuuya, Taisuke's father, approached him and led him further away into the hallway. "Wataru-kun..."
"Please tell me they're-"
"...Taisuke's condition is...let's say...hopeful. He's in the ICU and the doctors say that if he lives through the night alright he'll recover."
Those were good news...but Yokoo knew that it wasn't all there was to be said.
"...Hiromitsu-kun...he..." there was a pause, a sigh, a sad look, "He passed away before they could bring him to the hospital."
Suddenly there was a kind of numbness that crept onto him, taking over his whole body. He couldn't hear, couldn't see, couldn't think anymore. This couldn't be true...
Days passed by, Taisuke's condition stabilized but he remained in a coma. The doctors didn't know why the other didn't want to wake up. Yokoo had a feeling that it was because his friend instinctively knew that his boyfriend had passed away..? Or maybe...he didn't know. He kept watch at Taisuke's bed for days, talking to his friend and begging him to wake up.
Hiromitsu sat by the window and watched how Yokoo, who had been with Taisuke for almost 3 days straight, fell asleep sitting by the other's side. Nikaido, Senga, Tamamori and Miyata had been send home by the nurses since they had school or university to attend - Kis-my-Ft2 was on temporary hiatus - and everyone else had stopped by briefly but they had to work.
Having listened to Yokoo's little theory, Hiromitsu found that he had to agree...and after all...Kami had send him back to linger on until he'd taken care of this. People were right, spirits or ghosts lingering on in the world of the living did so because there was still unfinished business to see to. Thus, he walked over to the hospital bed and caressed his boyfriend's cheek before closing his eyes.
When he opened them again there was darkness. Darkness and the sound of soft whimpering. The source of the noise was at the far back and was a small human ball which consisted of Taisuke. Sighing softly Hiromitsu concentrated and the darkness changed into a room, an apartment. His apartment. Taisuke was now lying in a bed, still sniffing and asleep. Walking over, Hiromitsu crawled into the bed with the other and wrapped his arms around his miserable boyfriend. "Taisuke...wake up..." he whispered softly, to what, he supposed, was the other's soul...or whatever part of Taisuke existed in his dreamworld, their dreamworld, now. "Wake up..." he kissed the other's neck softly.
Taisuke stopped whimpering for a second when he suddenly felt arms around him, and there was that familiar feeling, but no, no, he was just imagining things, wasn't he? He started to whimper again, but at the same time, he didn't want to let go of that warmth, so he pressed closer, pressed closer to that warmth.
Then there was this voice, that voice that he loved, that voice that made him felt warm, but what was that voice saying? He didn't want to listen, not really, just let him hide a little longer, a little longer, just not quite yet. Even though it was that voice that he loved, just let him hide, sleep a little longer...
...he would have to dive deeper into the illusion. It would break his heart later on...it could destroy the one he loved forever but...if there was no only way...
"Taisuke wake up...I never thought I'd be saying this but...-you- are going to make us late for work this time..." he kissed and nuzzled the other's neck again. Hiromitsu had to keep himself from falling apart. He could feel it...almost vividly. Almost as if this were real as if he were still alive...but it was only an illusion. It was for Taisuke's sake. He had to keep telling himself that.
"Nhh...?" Taisuke whimpered softly before the words started to sink into his mind a little. Work? Was that, was that what the voice was telling him? Making a small sound, he slowly fluttered his eyes open. When he saw the face in front of him this time, he parted his lips a few times.
"H-Hiro..." Was that really Hiro in front of him? There was a slight, dull ache in his heart and he tried to understand why. "W-work?" he mumbled, his mind still feeling hazy. They were, they were supposed to be going to work? Wasn't there something else? Didn't...something happen?
Smiling - and hiding his true emotions, he could do anything in this illusion - Hiromitsu asked teasingly, "Am I rubbing off on you? Wataru won't like it..." he kissed the other. "Morning sleeping beauty."
"Hiro..." Taisuke repeated again, blinking his eyes at the other. "I..." Suddenly without realizing it, a tear rolled down his cheek. Why, why did his heart ache when he saw Hiro smile, teasing him like that? He gripped the other's shirt, his fingers curling tighter.
"What's wrong? Did you have a bad dream? You...you were whimpering miserably, too..." he brushed the tear off of Taisuke's cheek. "Come on...we have to get ready...or Wataru will be mad again."
Taisuke blinked again. "I...I don't know..." He pressed a hand over his own chest, his own heart. "It just...hurts suddenly when I saw Hiro..." He tilted his head a little and looked at Hiro with a confused look. "I don't know..."
"Maybe you really had a bad dream..." he wished it was all a bad dream, oh how he wished that, "Come on..." crawling out of bed he offered his hands to Taisuke to help the other up. "Let's go~"
"Maybe..." Taisuke said in a small voice. He wanted to pull Kitayama back towards him, just curling up against the other and never letting go, but, but he supposed he can't do that. So he nodded his head slowly and took Kitayama's hands, getting up.
Raising an eyebrow, Hiromitsu asked, "You're really acting weird today...are you sure you're fine?"
Taisuke nodded his head. "Un, I'm fine." His heart clenched and told him otherwise, but he ignored it and gave Hiro a smile. "Ne?"
"Mh?" Hiromitsu went over to his closet and changed into his clothes for the day.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, tugging on the end of his shirt, Taisuke nibbled on his lip. "Ne, Hiro, don't leave me?"
...Taisuke knew, didn't he? Subconsciously...
"Why should I leave you, Taisuke?"
Still biting on his lip, Taisuke shook his head. "I...don't know. Just, don't leave me? I don't want Hiro to leave me..."
He went over to the bed and hugged his boyfriend.
Taisuke hugged back tightly and buried his face in the crook of Hiro's neck. "If, if Hiro left me...I...I wouldn't know what to do..."
Please don't make this harder as it is...please, please, please...
"Tai-chan...you're making me sad..." -sad- had to be the understatement of the year.
Maybe people saw him as stronger than this, that he would be okay on his own, but he had been with Hiro for so long, that he can't imagine life with the other. Taisuke lifted his head and blinked at Hiro slowly, tilting his head. "I...oh," he said softly. "I'm sorry..."
"Come now...the other's are waiting..." Hiromitsu doubted whether his plan would be successful now...could he...could he be selfish after all? Or...or would the gods not allow that? Hiromitsu felt dispair taking over his heart but hid it again, as the illusion made them move to work...as usual...down the street to the subway...out of the subway station to the Jimusho building...
Once they were in the building, Taisuke couldn't help but reach for Kitayama's hand and grip it tightly. They couldn't hold hands in public, but in the building, they didn't have to hold back that much.
He squeezed back gently. They went up and met the rest of Kisumai and everyone else. Practice went as usual - even though Hiromitsu kicked his own illusion for choosing the song 'Good Bye, Thank You' since he almost broke out into tears at that - and then he came to the first little nudge...
Taisuke was surrounded by his friends, Wataru, Senga, Goseki, Kawaii...the little ones... Hiromitsu stepped back and hid, so the other wouldn't be able to see him but he could still see the other.
Practice went quite smoothly, but, but his heart wouldn't stop clenching, wouldn't stop aching as he sang the song, danced the choreography. Taisuke didn't understand it, didn't understand why he was acting that way, but he couldn't seem to help it.
During break, he ignored the look Yokoo gave him and just smiled at the little ones, letting them cling on to him, asking him things. After a few moments though, he lifted his head and looked around. "Ne, where's Hiro?"
"Hiro? I think he went to get a drink at the vending machine..." Goseki replied and then asked, smiling, "Ne, Taipi, Yokoo already said yes...but do you wanna come with us to karaoke, too after this?"
"Oh," Taisuke blinked. "Karaoke?" His eyes brightened just a little at the mention of it. "Un, ii yo. I'm free. Who else is going?"
"Yokoo, Senga, Nikaido, Fumi, Tottsu, Tsuka-chan, you and me so far?" Goseki replied, smiling gently.
"Ne, let's ask Hiro too?" Taisuke tilted his head with a small smile. "For some reason, I feel like it's been a while since I went to karaoke with Hiro."
"Oh, go on a date on your own," Yokoo said with a teasing voice.
Totsuka remarked, "Didn't Hiro say he didn't feel like karaoke today? So I guess he won't be coming..."
"I agree with Yokoo...you can always go on a date...don't forget about us!!" Nikaido commented, nudging Taisuke gently. "Sen-chan is complaining already...that Hiro's hogging you."
"Eh? But..." Taisuke pouted slightly. His heart clenched a little again and he furrowed his eyebrows together. "Hiro isn't hogging me..." He, he just didn't want Hiro to leave him, he just didn't want to spend too much time without Hiro. Is it, is it a bad thing? For some reason, he felt like clinging on to Hiro a lot today, or was it all the time? He wasn't sure.
"Don't you like hanging out with us? You've been spending so much time with Hiro lately...we barely get to see you..." and other similar complaints started to bubble up, directed at Taisuke.
Taisuke blinked, stepping a small step back. He quickly shook his head. "I-I never said that! I like spending time with you guys..."
"Well," Goseki said, "don't expect Hiro to come tonight then. You're spending time with us, na?"
"Yeah, it will be fun, Tai-chan!" Yokoo wrapped an arm around Taisuke. "Ne?"
Looking up at Yokoo, Taisuke nibbled on his lip before nodding his head. "Un, alright." He leaned a little closer to Yokoo. "Alright," he said again. He fluttered his eyes close for a moment. His heart ached again.
He let things unfold...let Taisuke go to karaoke with the others and then return home to his family. Hiromitsu stayed and watched...and wondered...if what he was doing was helping...or not.
Once dinner was finished, Taisuke went back up to his room and curled up on his bed. Something felt wrong, really. He loved spending time with his friends, and he knew that the others were right, that he couldn't spend time with Hiro forever, but something just didn't felt right, and his heart, his heart wouldn't stop aching, clenching every now and then. Why? Why was he acting like this?
It seemed like it was no use after all. Sighing, Hiromitsu 'stepped' into Taisuke's room and sat down on the other's chair, drawing up his legs and hugging them, resting his chin on his knees. "Don't you love your family and friends?"
"Eh?" Taisuke looked up and blinked at the other. "Hiro?" How did the other get into his room? Did Hiro came to visit? Did his parents let him in? "I...why do you ask that? I love them...why wouldn't I?"
"...would you say that you love them more than you love me? Please think about it and answer honestly...you don't have to consider...just answer honestly. Would you trade everything...your friends and your family solely for me..?" Hiromitsu asked, looking at Taisuke.
"E-eh?" Taisuke gave Hiro a look of confusion. Why, why was Hiro asking him this? Trade everything for Hiro, and have Hiro only? No, he didn't like the idea of life without his parents, without Yuusuke and Ryosuke, without Yokoo, without his other friends, but without Hiro? It hurt, it really hurts. "I...I don't know..." He blinked his eyes a few times, feeling them get watery. "Ne, ne, Hiro, why are you asking me this? Why?"
He held out his hand. "Take my hand?"
Taisuke blinked and reached out slowly to take Hiro's hand.
Pulling Taisuke along, he opened the door but instead of ending up in the Fujiaya Family's hallway they were in a hospital room. There was the steady beep of the heart monitor and the sound of the respirator. The person lying on the hospital bed had a bandage around the head and various on the arms as well as plasters but you could still see who it was. Yokoo lying there, head bedded on his arms was a good hint as well.
"...this is reality, Taisuke...what you just saw...was...a dream...and illusion..." Hiromitsu whispered. "...Wataru hasn't left your side for more than a few minutes since that day...your family comes in every day and all of your friends stop over as often as work and school permits them to."
Taisuke's eyes widened just slightly as he took in the sight in front of him. His body tensed and his hand tightened itself around Hiro's. "H-Hiro...?" he asked in a shaky voice, his eyes tearing up, getting watery almost immediately. "I-Illusion?" Why would the things just happened just now be an illusion? And, and why was only Yokoo by his side.
He turned to look at Kitayama, a lost expression on his face. "Ne, ne, Hiro? Where...where are...you? Hiro, where are you?"
He smiled sadly. "I'm here with you, am I not?"
"Chi-chigau..." Taisuke shook his head. "If...if that's me there, where's Hiro then? Hiro, Hiro, you...you wouldn't leave me alone, right? You wouldn't leave me alone, right?" A tear rolled down from his eye. "Ne? Shouldn't, shouldn't you be by my side...?"
The door to the hospital room opened and Hiromitsu's mother stepped in. She was wearing a black dress. Smilings sadly, she went over to gently shake Yokoo and wake him up, telling him to go over and lie down on the second bed the nurses had brought, to take a rest. Then, she handed him an envelope with a sad smile before walking over to stroke Taisuke's hair softly, crying softly as she did.
Hiromitsu was still smiling sadly. "Do you know what's inside that envelope?"
Why was Hiro's mother wearing black? Why black? Taisuke stiffened, looking at Hiro, still with a lost, helpless look. "I...I don't know, Hiro..." He wasn't sure if he wanted to know when his heart started to ache again and he had to clutch his shirt, biting his lip as he looked at Hiro.
He swallowed before he replied quietly, "It's my funeral in a few days. That was the invitation."
Taisuke could only stare at Kitayama with wide eyes, lips slightly parted. It took him a few seconds before he managed to say, "Hiro...?" in the weakest voice ever. Slowly, he started to shake his head. "No...no...ne? Hiro, ne, you're, you're lying, right? You'll...you'll come into the room a few moments later, right? You'll come in and hold my hand, and tell me to wake up, so we can be together, again, right? Ne, Hiro," his voice started to get a little louder. "Hiro, Hiro, you're lying, right? You, you said you wouldn't leave me! Hiro...!" His voice broke and a sob was heard.
"Remember Taisuke...remember what happened..." Hiromitsu said weakly, unable to hold back his own tears. The deafening sounds of metal bursting and people screaming and things crashing and flying around came back to his memory and echoed in the 'realm' they were in right now. "I'm so sorry I can't keep my promise...I'm so sorry Taisuke..." He was close to breaking down but he willed himself to be strong...for the other's sake.
Shaking his head, shaking his head, tears were now rolling down Taisuke's face. "No, no, I don't want to remember...!" If he remembered, then that would be admitting that Hiro was dead, right? His hand tightening around Hiro's hand, his other hand pulled the other closer. "Ne, ne, it's not true, right?" he cried, he sobbed. "You're still here, you're still with me, Hiro. Don't say that, don't say sorry..." His body was trembling, he was shaking and please, this wasn't real. This wasn't real, right?
"...Taisuke...I'm still here because you want me to be...you haven't made a choice yet...you're neither living nor moving on...and...I'm here because I want you to make that choice. You cannot remain like this forever..." Hiromitsu whispered and just let Taisuke do as he pleased even though his heart was shattering into a thousand pieces. "You cannot hide forever Taisuke..."
"N-no, can't, can't I hide in here forever, with you, Hiro?" Taisuke asked in a weak voice, tugging on Hiro's shirt. "I...I want to stay with Hiro forever, I don't want to leave, I don't want to live without Hiro, I don't want to, I just want Hiro, please, please? I don't want to, I don't want to..." He was starting to babble, ramble, but, please, don't leave him.
He slapped Taisuke. "Snap out of it!" his hand was shaking. Hiromitsu lowered it again and looked down. "Don't be so selfish Taisuke...you have a choice! ...do you want your family and everyone else to...to suffer even more because of you?"
Taisuke's face remained turned, the cheek that Hiro had slapped facing the other. He blinked, and bit back another sob. He was shaking as well, trembling, shivering. He knew what the other was saying, understood, but, but he couldn't help it. He didn't want to leave Hiro.
"N-no..." he whispered, "but, but I don't want to live without Hiro..." He felt broken with Hiro by his side, lost, hopeless.
"...I didn't want to leave either...but what can we do?" he pulled Taisuke into his arms. "Choose wisely, Taisuke...if you decide to stay...I'll be waiting for you. I'll watch over you from...wherever I will go. I will wait..." Hiromitsu bit back a sob. "I'll always love you...and I swear that's a promise I'll keep no matter what."
Clinging on to Hiro, Taisuke tried to bite another sob. "I...I'll always love Hiro too...I'll never forgot you, I'll never, never stop loving you..."
"Now...will you wake up? If you do...please...please take care of Kaa-san for me, okay? And of everyone else...and remember...I'll be there...I'll always be here..." he put a hand over Taisuke's heart.
Taisuke didn't reply for a few moments. He just clung on to Hiro and didn't let go. Biting down on his lip, he shook his head. "Ne, not yet? Not yet, Hiro...let me, let me stay with you a little longer? Then, then, I'll promise I'll wake up..." He sniffled. "Just let me stay with you a little longer..."
"Taisuke...we don't have much time...your body...if your body dies there will be no turning back..." he held onto his boyfriend. "Follow me when the time comes...and please be happy."
There was an almost deafening beeping sound and the scene around them turned into panic and chaos.
Eyes widening when the sound was heard, Taisuke shook his head again, again and again. "No, no..." he whimpered. "Just a little longer. I want to stay a little longer, Hiro..."
"Taisuke please...before it's too late...I love you..." he pulled the other up and kissed his boyfriend one last time. "I...I'll see you at the funeral..." Hiromitsu stroked Taisuke's cheek gently. "Now...GO!"
Pressing back into the kiss desperately, Taisuke whimpered again, "No, please, Hiro...I love you too..."
He was starting to hear voices more clearly though. Yokoo calling his name, his parents, and was that Yuusuke and Ryosuke? They were pulling him away from Hiro, and no, he didn't want to let go yet. Please. A little longer. He didn't want to leave Hiro, he'll never be in Hiro's arms again, he'll never get kissed by the other again, he'll never, God, he'll never do any of the things he want to do with Hiro ever again. Just a little longer...
"Hiro...!" Taisuke cried, but it was too late, the force a little too strong, and soon, Hiro became further and further away from him until there was only darkness, and only darkness.
From his actual body, a tear rolled down his cheek, rolled from his eyes, yet another tear.
Hiromitsu was pushed back into the position from where he could only watch. So he watched how the doctors did his best to bring Taisuke back to live and the sighs of relief when the other's heart started to beat again. And after a few moments, his boyfriend fluttered open his tear filled eyes.
Yokoo was on his feet immediately. "Taisuke! Taisuke you're awake, can you hear me?"
Everyone else followed suit and soon the whole family was crowded around the other's bed - more or less, since the nurses wouldn't allow total chaos around their patient.
Taisuke wasn't sure how long he spent staring at the ceiling. All he knew was that his heart hurt, it ached and even though he was alive and promised Hiro to wake up, he still didn't really want to leave the other, that he wasn't ready for this. Not quite yet.
He just kept on blinking his eyes, blinking them and letting more tears roll down his cheeks. It wasn't until Yokoo appeared in his view, mouth moving, that he started to pay attention, concentrate a little, and realized Yokoo was calling his name. That his parents were there as well, that his brothers were there.
"W-Wataru..." he whispered hoarsely, his voice dry from being in a coma. The tears were still falling.
It was like he'd been pushed back behind a wall of glass. Hiromitsu slid down to the 'floor' and wept. There was no turning back anymore now.
"You're awake...you're really awake..." and the usually calm and collected Yokoo broke into tears.
Yokoo was crying. Yokoo was crying, and for a moment, Taisuke just stared, not knowing how to react. Finally, he croaked again, "W-Wataru..." He moved his hand slowly and gripped the other's shirt. He wanted to be with Hiro, he didn't want to leave, but, but he didn't want to see Yokoo cry either.
His other hand though was suddenly gripped by someone else and he had to turn his head slowly to realize it was his mother. "'K-Kaasan..."
Kitayama Shouko was crying a little as well. She knew as the only 'outsider' (meaning, the other boys from the Jimusho) - aside from maybe Yuusuke, who was suspecting something - of Taisuke's and Hiromitsu's relationship. She would have the hard task of somehow breaking the news to the other. Little did she know that Taisuke already knew.
For now, she just watched.
"Oh God, I'm so glad you're awake..." Fujigaya Asami sobbed, leaning her cheek against the back of Taisuke's hand. "Taisuke..."
Taisuke just looked at his mother, then his father, his brothers a little lostly. They were all crying, and his heart ached a little again. They were all crying because of him, and for a moment, he felt bad for wanting to stay with Hiro. That he didn't like the ones he cared about to cry like that, but, but what if Hiro was crying like that somewhere too?
Yokoo held Taisuke's hand tightly and murmured, "Tai-chan, Tai-chan..."
Taisuke tried to respond, but only one word would slip out. "H-Hiro..."
Immediately after the name had been spoken, silence fell over the room. Nobody dared to speak. Nobody could speak...
Clearly, clearly remembering his dream or whatever is was, Taisuke knew what the answer was going to be. He knew, he understood, but it didn't mean he could say it out loud. So he just tugged on Yokoo's hand, blinking his glassy eyes at his friend. "N-ne," he said, his voice still weak, small, "H-Hiro...?"
Willing himself to stay collected and more or less calm, Yokoo wiped his tears and took a deep breath before looking down. "He's not coming, Taisuke...he's not here...not here...anymore." he didn't know how else to put it. Sure, he was usually the calm and mature one in Kisumai but this situation was too much even for him. It hurt so much...
"Not...here..." Taisuke repeated weakly, Yokoo's words echoing in his mind. Ah, it really does hurt more, hurt a lot more when he heard it actually being said out loud. He wasn't sure what to do. He had, he had already reacted quite a bit when Hiro told him, showed him after all.
That didn't stop the tears from flowing again though, that his heart clenched so much that he was almost sure that he was going to die, that he couldn't really breathe, that everything seemed to spin and fade. Pulling his hand away from his mother, he flailed almost blindly at Yokoo, letting a cry of despair.
A few nurses rushed to the bed and tried to calm down as well as sedate the visibly upset young male on the bed so that he wouldn't agitate his own injuries or worse. Yokoo could only watch, having been pushed away. He still tried to talk though. "Taisuke...it...he was already gone...they couldn't save him...he...he-"
Hiromitsu's head snapped up.
No...No Yokoo don't say it, I beg you!
His screams remained unheard.
"...protected you..." the police and fire fighters had come to talk to the families and friends of course to tell them about the circumstances and all of course. Hiromitsu and Taisuke had been found together in one of the carriages which hadn't been directly hit by the falling billboards but had been derailed and toppled over. From the looks of it Hiromitsu had cushioned Taisuke's fall as the carriage was slammed onto it's side. In the process of it several shards of glass had embedded themselves in both but in addition Hiromitsu had landed on rock and metal and a piece of a broken rail had gone through the shorter male's body, severing several nerves and hitting one of the main blood arteries. Part of it had also penetrated Taisuke's side but hadn't caused any severe injuries.
Kitayama Shouko stepped forward when the nurses succeeded in sedating the boy. She took Taisuke's hand and put something into it before closing his fingers around it. Leaning forward, she whispered into his ear so nobody else would be able to hear. "He...he really loves you." She wasn't using the past tense since she was sure that...wherever Hiromitsu was now, he still felt the same. As to what she had just given to Taisuke...It was Hiromitsu's ring. The one that had become his trademark, the silver one with the huge black gemstone. Hiromitsu would have wanted the other to have it, she was sure.
Taisuke wanted to cry, scream, anything when he heard Yokoo's words, but he couuldn't, the medicine had started to take effect much too quickly. Why, why did Hiro have to protect him? If Hiro hadn't protect him, would the other be still alive now? Would they have both died together? If his mind was clear right now, he would understand that Hiro did it because he loves him, but Taisuke wasn't thinking properly now. His mind, his heart, his everything was just crying, crying for Hiro, that he really shouldn't have left, shouldn't have woken up after all. He just wanted Hiro now, please.
His fingers twitched when Kitayama's mother placed something in his hand, and his mind came back just a little bit, the inner screamings dying down just a little. He fumbled with the little item for a bit before recognizing it and soon, tears were gathering in his eyes once more. He looked at the woman, stared at her before whispering, "T-thank you..."
"...I know he would have wanted you to have it..." she brushed away a tear of her own. Shouko put her hand over Taisuke's and whispered, "I'll always be there for you, Taisuke-kun. You know that, ne? We...can miss him together."
Hiromitsu had walked over to the bad shakily and embraced his mother from behind. Even though he couldn't feel her and vice versa. It made him feel better. At least a little bit.
Still staring at the woman, Taisuke nodded his head slowly. "U-un..." Hiro, Hiro told him to take care of his mother for him, didn't he? So, so that was a promise that he had to keep, wasn't it?
Tightening his hold on the ring, he just kept on murmuring Hiro's name over and over in his mind, fluttering his eyes open and close. Awake, yet not really awake, yet not really there.
He walked over to the bed and reached his hand out, touching his love one last time. Hiromitsu was being pulled away. And he couldn't resist the pull any longer. Somebody placed a hand onto his shoulder and pulled more firmly, making him whirl around.
Eyes widening in shock he looked at the 'person' in front of him. "Tou-san..." he croaked weakly.
Kitayama Mitsukuni smiled at him warmly. "I wished it wasn't you but your mother I was allowed to welcome back in my arms first...but...I guess it wasn't meant to be. Now...let's go. Or you'll be bound to this place forever, loosing any chance to see him again. You may only say farewell when your spirit is cleansed by the priests in a few days..."
"Hai..." he turned around once more with a quiet "I love you..." before he followed his father and 'vanished'.
Taisuke's eyes flew open though when he thought he heard Hiro's voice, Hiro's voice saying those three words and he could only whisper them back, trying stop tears from flowing again.
Yokoo, noticing his friend's movement, shuffled a little closer to the bed and took Taisuke's hand. "Tai-chan? Are you...alright?" He could only imagine what the other was feeling, after hearing...that kind of news and most likely trying to accept everything.
Shouko bid her farewell as well. There were still so many things to do..and she also had to work...
"Get well, Taisuke-kun, ne? And...and come to say goodbye to him, too..."
Looking at Kitayama's mother when the other spoke, Taisuke blinked slowly before nodding his head. "U-un...I...will..."
Yokoo lowered his eyes and just squeezed Taisuke's hand. He hoped his friend was okay, that hopefully even after the sedatives have passed, that the other wouldn't break down too much or do anything stupid...
The nurses and a doctor came in, telling everyone to either go home or get some sleep and that Taisuke needed peace, quiet and rest, seeing that he was recovering and still not 100% safe...
Ryuuya went towards the other side of the bed and placed a hand on Yokoo's shoulder. "Wataru-kun, you should go home now since Taisuke's awake. We'll stay here to take care of him, alright?"
Taisuke squeezed Yokoo's hand and looked at his friend. "I-it's okay, Wataru..." he whispered.
"...alright...but I'll come and visit again tomorrow..." Yokoo squeezed Taisuke's hand gently. "Get well, okay?"
Taisuke tried to smile a little, but gave up after a few seconds. He nodded his head though. "Un...I will..."
The days passed again. Taisuke wasn't quite released from the hospital yet but the doctors allowed him to attend Hiromitsu's funeral a few days later. He had to stay in a wheelchair and was then carried into the shrine room by his father for the service.
Hiromitsu's body had been put into a coffin and surrounded by red flowers. It looked as if he were just peacefully asleep. But he was neither breathing nor was his body warm.
Taisuke remained quiet throughout the service. Too quiet perhaps. He wasn't crying, nor did his eyes look red or glassy. He just sat there and listened to the service go on, his eyes never leaving the coffin. That received several worrying looks from people, but still, Taisuke didn't move.
What added to the worrying looks was what some people spotted on Taisuke's finger. It was the ring Shouko had given the young male at the hospital the night he had woken up from his coma.
Once the service was over, a lot of people went over to Kitayama's mother to give their regards and all, but Taisuke remained unmoving, still staring at the coffin.
Yokoo couldn't stand it anymore, that this uncrying, unmoving, untalking Taisuke was just too much and it just doesn't feel right. Kneeling beside the other, he placed a hand over Taisuke's hands on his lap. "Tai-chan...?"
Taisuke just blinked and continued to stare.
He 'opened his eyes' and looked around. People were leaving...Taisuke...! Hiromitsu's eyes darted to the side. Surely enough, he was standing next to his love. The look in the other's eyes caused his heart to clench painfully. His koibito looked so...dead...and yet he was still alive. It shouldn't be like that...
Stepping, or rather floating, closer, he knelt down and wrapped his arms around the other. "I love you...I love you..." he wished he could feel the other against him...but there was nothing. It was as if he were hugging solid air. "I'll be waiting...waiting for you to come..."
"Tai-chan," Yokoo called out again, now gripping the other's hand. "You...you want to say good-bye to Hiro?" He tried to bite back his own tears, hating the way Taisuke looked. He knew, he knew Taisuke might not have the will to live, but damnit, Taisuke was alive and living now, and he better not do anything stupid!
Not receiving an answer, Yokoo just carried Taisuke anyways, and brought the other closer to the coffin, so that Hiro was more visible to them. "Ne, Tai-chan, say g-good-bye, alright? I'll leave you alone to say good-bye to Hiro, okay?"
Luckily, the people remaining were pretty much people who understood the situation. Catching Hiro's mother's eyes, Yokoo bowed his head slightly. Soon, Taisuke was left alone in the room to say farewell to Hiro.
These would be his very last moments in this world. His father was waiting for him on 'the other side'...but these were the last few moments granted to him, granted to say goodbye...to hear his goodbyes...
"Taisuke...my Taisuke..." he was still hugging the other, not looking down at his own dead body.
After a few seconds, maybe a few minutes, maybe longer, Taisuke finally moved. He sat up a little taller and blinked down at Hiro's body. The look on the other's face was calm and he was almost certain Hiro would wake up anytime and smile at him. He reached slowly and brushed a finger against the other's cheek. The cold skin reminded him otherwise and he froze for a second.
"N-ne, Hiro..." he whispered, voice stil slightly hoarse. "I...I have to say good-bye..." He bit down on his lip just slightly. "I...don't want to though. I want to be with Hiro forever and never having to say farewell. I still want to do a lot of things with Hiro..." He resumed touching the cold skin. "B-but, H-Hiro wanted me to wake up...so I did..." He sat back down a little and rested an arm on the coffin edge, resting his head on his arm. "W-would Hiro hate me though if I don't live properly? Ne, I...I promise I'll live properly? Just...just not now, Hiro. It still hurts ne, it still hurts..."
Grief...that's only natural, isn't it? But...please be happy again as well. I want you to be happy...
Hiromitsu stroked Taisuke's hair, while he listened to the other speak.
"I'll live properly...and I'll visit Obasan a lot ne?" Taisuke continued. "I'll take care of her like Hiro want me to ne. I..." He wasn't sure what else to say. "I don't want to say good-bye, Hiro..." he repeated himself. He now leaned closer to the body, leaning a little over the coffin. "So, so, see...see you later ne, Hiro? You said you'd wait for me, right? I'll see you again...ne? So, so, see you later...Hiro..."
Taisuke bit down on his lip for a second before leaning further in and pressing his warm lips against Kitayama's cold pair. "I love you, Hiro..."
He could almost feel the kiss. It felt so good...and yet it tore him apart on the inside.
...bu Taisuke's words made him happy and he smiled, despite the tears still running down his cheeks.
Of course I'll wait...I'll wait...for the day I can hold you in my arms again...
Pulling back, Taisuke just went back to leaning against the coffin and staring at Hiro, not speaking anymore. If he knew when he would die, he would probably start a countdown, but he knew Hiro wouldn't like that. Hiro would get mad at him, and he didn't want Hiro mad.
After a while, Yokoo came back into the room. He wasn't sure what expression to put on when he noticed Taisuke lying against the coffin, his hand still grazing over Hiro's face. "Tai-chan," he said softly, moving closer to the other. "Have you, have you said farewell yet?"
Taisuke didn't answer and just continued to touching Hiro's skin. He talked in front of Hiro, but it didn't mean he would talk in front of others just yet. Soon though. He had promised Hiro after all.
Once Taisuke left the room and the coffin was closed, Hiromitsu left as well, left the realm of the living behind to go and wait.
Time passed, days turned into weeks, weeks into months and months into years. Hiromitsu didn't really know how much time had passed until one day, a door opened in front of him. He knew immediately what it meant and ran towards it. Finally...the day had come...
Taisuke felt weak and he slowly couldn't breathe anymore. His eyes were starting to flutter close, and he couldn't see, couldn't see the people around him anymore. It was time, wasn't it? He could tell that the day had finally come. Hiro, Hiro will smile at him, wouldn't he?
He had been good. He had lived well, he took care of Hiro's mother, he took care of his family, he took care of his friends, and, and he let people take care of him as well. Hiro will be happy, right? He had been good, so please, Hiro, come? He wanted to see the other so badly. He had never ever stopped thinking of the other for a single day, and even though he can smile, he can laugh, Yokoo once told him, that his smile was always the best when he was with Hiro.
Then, it was time for that smile to appear again, right?
About to close his eyes for the last time, Taisuke could almost see a bright light, someone, someone familiar coming towards him. Ah, Hiro, is that you? He smiled and reached out his hand.
Hiromitsu touched the hand that reached out for him and from one moment to the other...all the years of waiting vanished and he pulled Taisuke into his arms. Neither of them looked a day younger or older than the last time they had met.
Smiling, yet crying, he held his love close. "I missed you so much...but now you're back in my arms..." he sobbed a little bit. "Finally...finally..." he sought out Taisuke's lips. "I love you...I love you still and I have never stopped loving you for a single moment..."
Tightening his arms around Hiro, Taisuke was crying as well, sobbing as he buried his face in the crook of Hiro's neck for a moment. "I missed you too, Hiro..." He kissed back almost clumsily and continued, "I love you too, I love you too, and, and I love you only, Hiro...I never stopped loving you either..."
He pulled back to look at Hiro, taking in the familiar face that he was never tired of memorizing, studying, touching. Trialing a hand over that face, Taisuke smiled, really smiled at Hiro. "I love you, Hiro..." Again, he leaned closer and kissed the other, this time firmer, longer, because it would never be enough.
They had so much lost time to make up for...so much time...but now...now they had eternity.
Hiromitsu returned the kisses just as fervently and desperately, clutching onto his taller lover and holding him close, afraid that Taisuke would slip away again if he let him go. Then after some time, he pulled away a little bit and looked into the other's eyes. Feeling something 'cool' against his 'skin' he noticed the ring on Taisuke's finger. "You wore it...?" he smiled and looked up.
Taisuke smiled back shyly and nodded his head. "Un...I didn't want Hiro to leave my side...and...and wearing the ring made me feel better..." If he didn't wear it, he would feel uncomfortable and nothing felt right. He remembered when he had nearly lost the ring once and how much he had fretted and worried and Yokoo had to slap him out of it. "Hiro..." he mumbled. Ah, he missed murmuring, mumbling the other's name like that, so much.
"You have me back now...you have me back...and I have you back, too..." another kiss, another touch...they'd have time to fully enjoy this re-union later. Now was the time when other things had to be done. "Have you done everything you had to do? Nothing left to say...?" he didn't know how exactly the other had died. So he didn't know whether anything still had to be done...unlike the time when he had left the other world. He'd felt the pull of Taisuke, calling for him and clinging to him, drifting between life and death...
"I can't take you with me if there is..." he held onto the other's hand. Hiromitsu hoped there wasn't anything. He was so impatient now...now that he had Taisuke back in his arms after...he didn't know how long.
Taisuke blinked and tilted his head for a moment, pondeing what Hiro was saying. Then he smiled and shook his head. "Uun, I'm fine...I didn't die suddenly ne, I talked to a lot of people already..." There was always other things that he would like to do again, but it wasn't anything important and, and he was sure he can go with Hiro.
He squeezed Hiro's hand back. He understood the other's impatience and he felt the same way. "It's okay, Hiro," he said softly. "Take me away ne?" He gave Hiro a small smile. "Forever ne..."
"Forever..." he agreed and then pulled Taisuke along. "Forever..." he echoed again.
Author's Note: So...who needed to use the tissues? =X Part of this was role-played while I was in lecture, so uh, you can imagine how hard it was. Good thing we were looking through slides and the room was dark. Otherwise people would have seen my tears. ><'' As Kira said, we're...moving through the genres of fiction? //whacked//
I'll post something I wrote relating to this later, because um, there might be more tears...>.>'' So uh, you guys won't cry too much at one time? Or maybe it was just me. I'm sensitive and cries easily. =X
I'm uh...guessing it'll be a while before we post collabs again...?
Comments are love and appreciated~ ♥